Why can't I have my childcare and career too?

When my husband and I decided to have babies, we factored in many things. But we never imagined that we would have a hard time been a two parent working household. Why would we? We both have good jobs that pay well, and other people do it right??

What we found out very quickly is that working and paying for childcare is not that easy! With two kids enrolled, we are paying more than I bring in, and watching other financial obligations slip as we prioritize the budget to ensure rent, child care, car payments, and groceries are covered. It is easy to think that the solution is me staying home, but the couple hundred bucks we

 

would net per month, is not really a balance for letting go of health insurance, dental insurance, and 401K.

Not to mention, I love my job. My job is exciting, meaningful, and well paying. My boss is a family first guy, and has always been nothing but flexible and compassionate.

My husband likes his job too. Okay, maybe it does not really take advantage of his PhD in Computational Neuroscience. It has been tough to find a job  in this area that we love that would truly fit that bill. That said, the job he has is well paying, and has growth potential.

So what is the problem? if our salaries are not the issue, and we are certainly not overpaying the teachers that care for our boys, (break it down by day and by hour, and really, it is not much) then what is? How does this work? How can a family of four with two working parents stay afloat? Is it the Government's problem to solve? probably not, though at some point any of us who feel like we are drowning would likely be grateful for any help... Let's Grow Kids has been working to figure out the issue as well, hopefully someone can do so soon! 

The truth is, I don't know where the fracture is that makes it hard or for some of us, and impossible for some, to maintain a middle class family structure. But I am not ready to give up on what feels right to me. I want to work, even when I miss my boys terribly. I want to work, and I want to be able to pay my bills with the money I make at work, and I want to be able to pay those bills and still be able to treat my boys, because that is why we have pushed so hard to get where we are! For financial comfort, and stability, which of course is not everything, but it is something, and I am not sure it is the American dream to have to choose between the work you love, and paying for childcare. Something is not quite right with this picture.